Thanks FreeVerse,
thanks for the response, but I'm still unclear about this point. I had difficulty articulating my question very specifically in the last post so I'll rephrase here.
Vin says that capitalizing on windows of opportunity is attractive and that not capitalizing on windows of opportunity is unattractive.
I've experienced this for sure - sometimes you have an opening, you don't take it and it never comes up again.
However, I've also had times where I've built attraction by NOT jumping on windows of opportunity.
Now, before I found Vin's stuff, I studied mainly David DeAngelo and he has some 'techniques' where you playfully push a woman away while accusing her of trying to get you into bed.
For example, when she touches your arm and you look down at her hand as if to say "why are you touching me? we just met"
When this is done in a playful teasing way that demonstrates that you don't reeeally mean it, it can be very effective.
I've done this maaany times and I could see the change in the girl of "this guy's different...most guys are trying to touch me every chance they get and this guy's doing the opposite"
Although I found this to be effective for sparking attraction, I found a few problems with it:
1. it was sometimes an awkward transition to start escalating...the frame has to shift because I can't simultaneously push her away and move things forward.
2. If my state was a little nervous, I'd just make her uncomfortable and come off looking like a weirdo prick.
3. She can sometimes switch into "two can play at that game" and refuse to comply with escalation
4. She can sense that you’re “gaming”
Even with all these possible problems, it’s worked with some EXTREMELY attractive women...
All in all, I'm finding it feels more congruent to capitalize on windows of opportunity but it means I have to distinguish myself and build sexual tension and intrigue in other ways.
So there it is...perhaps not as clearly asked as I'd like but I hope someone can shed some light on this...
Thanks again,
Z  |