Prof, I think you may have gone for the kiss too soon. Brush up on the DiCarlo Escalation Ladder. You had incidental class 1 kino when you touched her arm, but then jumped straight to kissing and got resistance.
I have a similar psychology to yours in some ways, emotional connection is important. But a woman wants the man to be the tiger and the lover at the same time. I get the impression you're only being the lover OR the tiger. You need to be them both at once. If she does start sleeping with you, it will be easy to transition into a long-term relationship and the emotional connection will deepen. I don't know if you've read any of Daniel Rose's or David Shade's materials, but they cover this emotional aspect of sex pretty well.
As for the seriousness... Try doing improv comedy classes? You seem similar to me, I'm very left-brain-dominant. Exercise, Yoga, playing a sport can all get you out of your head and into your body.
Edit: Do you work at the same university? She may be wary of getting involved with a co-worker. In any case, let what happens, happen. You will either get the girl or get experience that will help with the next one
