[rarebreed]

Originally Posted by mycer

so i met a girl who is friends with 3 of my close female friends who have nothing but good things to say about me (im not a player, im very honest with all girls). she said before we went on the date that shes not looking for a boyfriend. i think; perfect, i dont really want a girlfriend, sweet. shes super hot so hopefully we can just be bang buddies.

Seems like the both of you are on the same page.

so she shows up, we start talking, and we really hit it off. like really ive never connected to ANYONE like this so fast. and i felt that she felt it too. i have an interest in certain obscure writers and artists, and she knew exactly what i was talking about and we were both so absorbed in the conversation. i tell her about this art book and she gets excited to see it so we go back to my place so i can show it to her.

Nothing wrong with having commonalities, but do you really think she wanted to have an emotional connection or a physical one? What was preventing you from escalating when you first met her up until you took her to your place? Why didn't you escalate when she was back in your place?

we met up at the bar at 8pm. stayed till about 10pm, went back to my place and talked till past 4 am. I was escalating a bit but i could tell she wasnt into it, like she didnt want anything to happen that night. so i just played it cool. we talked about so much and really got to know eachother and i fell for her like I've NEVER fallen for anyone before. I was not expecting this. I know its better to escalate sooner but i didnt want to make her feel too uncomfortable around me so i figured i'd wait till the second date.

What are you really looking for in this woman? Didn't you say you want to be bang buddies? Why do you think she wasn't into your escalations? How can you tell she wasn't "into it"?

no reply. I figure i'll wait another 2 days and if theres still no reply i have a few funny things i can text her with. basically i think i want this girl as a girlfriend... no rush tho im patient.

I know exactly what you're going through. I've got story after story after story. Why the sudden shift from "bang buddies" to "girlfriend"?

also i should mention that she didnt test me at all (?). she told me she has made some mistakes in the past with men (probably cheating). she is probably seeing another guy right now, but i doubt they connected the way me and her did. her friends say shes not a player and shes really a good person and shes broken some hearts in the past and feels bad about that so shes being cautious (actually she told me this). our mutual friends havnt talked to her in a bit but theyre doing some investigating for me and they really want the two of us to hook up, i'll post what they find out about her when i hear word.

So she has probably cheated with guys, she's probably seeing some other player and she's broken some hearts. What makes you think she's not a player? Why don't you meet other girls? Is she really that special? Do you not have other options? Are you trying to tell me that there's no one like her?

any advice (or questions) is greatly appreciated.

Sorry I couldn't help.