Sarging in university!!!!

[maverick]

Ok, so here goes. I met this very cute half taiwanese and half chinese girl some time back in my uni. She is atleast an 8.5 - 9. Totally my type, seriously. I had a crush on her as soon as i met her.

It was just random stuff like one of my mates, a chinese guy was talking to one of her guy friend and she was kind of standing at the corner and I was standing beside her while my freind was chatting with that guy. Now this chic gives me a sly smile and I smile back and say Hi and then my friend leaves and its just me, her and that other guy my friend was talking to earlier. Meanwhile me and that chic were just talking random stuff and she said she was waiting for one of her friends and since i was free, we kept chatting and i kept busting on her name and other stuff and she liked it so we kept chatting for like 10 mins and I busted on her all this time while her guy friend kept standing there with me laughing at her and I am sure she loved every part of it. Ok so she leaves after that and I dont ask for her number or anything. This was all about 45 days back.

I saw her again today and I was like "Hey I have seen you somewhere but dont really remember" and she was like "Hey I remember you now".

Ok, so we were both there for enrollment for next semester and we both were waiting to meet the student councillor. Now I started busting on her again like "You are such a dork, You are like a 7 yr old girl in a 19 year old body who needs spanking and she kept hitting me on the shoulder few times and was like fuck you, fuck off playfully". We are standing there and this chic passes by who has a t-shirt with a chic's face on it and i am like "Hey that you on the t shirt and that chic even started laughing so basically i kept busting on her all the time, kept talking random shit. I touch her hair and say its the same hairstyle too. I even told that chic that she should give her that t shirt sometime so she can wear a mask and people will still be able to see her from that photo on the t shirt. She told that chic I am crazy and a jerk.

I am like "I am walking with a dorky stupid chic" and we are in the hallway and I am kind of shouting(not really shouting but i was loud enough for people around to hear me) like "Hey I am not with this girl" to the people walking by....lol...that was seriously hilarious, the look on her face of awe and shock was invaluable. She's like stop it and I am like "no, you are a dork. I dont want to be seen with you". I start teasing her by standing away from her and as soon as she came close to me I moved away from her and she starts laughing. She bit her lips many times and had those facial expression and movements when you know that it's on and I started copying each of her movements and started biting my lips and made fun of her and she keeps hitting me on the arm.

I ask her if she knows my name and she says its very weird and long and stuff kind of like started busting on me and I am like you really are weird and slightly hit her on the shoulder. I bring my hands in front to shake hands and tell her i am Jas but she didnt shake hands with me and kind of turned the other side. Then I am like you know when you laugh your nose wiggles but its very cute. She is like shut up you bastard playfully. She was looking at my shorts and i am like what and cover up my dick area and she cracks up and she is kind of shocked. I try to hit her on her shoulder gently but she moves away three times when ever i try to. I am like you are so rude, i dont wanna talk to you and she says ok and is silent now. I make fun of her again and we get back to talking.

Then i am standing with a friend and I start talking to him and ignore her a little and then i start making fun of her again with this friend, kept teasing her and even he started laughing. She got a little turned off and she went in the room but who cares but then i try and start convo with her again but she didnt delve into it too much so i didnt force it and i kept standing outside. First i thought i should go in and sit beside her but then i changed my mind and thought that wasnt a good idea.

Then she comes out after a while and we are standing a little far on the opposite sides. i knew something went wrong there and then meets on of her friends and as soon as her friend leaves i am like you are so rude, you should have introduced me to your friend, thats a polite thing to do. She bumps into two guys and doesnt apologise to them and i am like you really are rude and that you didnt even apologise tio them and that if i was you i would be so damn angry.

She gets a little pissed off, i could see from her face and her expressions and avoids me a little for a while and kep standing a little away from me.

She asks me how old i am and i say old enough then i say 14 and i wanna be 18 till i die. I ask her old she is and she says 19. I say noway you are like what 10 and that since i am 2 years older than her i will have to teach her some stuff. I ask her if she wants to go the shopping center nearby as i have to get a piercing done, she makes up soem story and says she cant come and i am like ok. She left me standing there and went in, now i made A HUGE MISTAKE of following her and trying to start conversation again and my hands were somehow shaking and i was trying so hard to contro my body language constantly trying to lean back and trying not to face her and make her move towards me so she can face me, sometimes it worked, sometimes i failed miserably

Now we are in the room again and she is standing outside and out of blue i am like " Hey do you have msn" and i am like you are weird but cute so its ok and she says no and i am like what are you living in a stone age or something coz i knew she was bluffing and then she was like oh i thought you said do i have a car and then she says yes and i get my diary out but damn it i cant find my pen and so she quickly changes the topic and i think she said she wont write it but i am not sure, dont remember. Then i tell her she is weird again and she is like not as much as you are and i am like dont you think you are weird. She assertively says no and tells me that she thinks i am weird. Then she says her handwriting is bad and i am like no problem i am sure you need a lesson in that too and i get my pen out. But DAMNIT WTF DID I DO? I got my personal diary out and she grabs it and tries to open and read it, i snatch it back from her and say Hey thats my personal diary, you cant read that. She is like you write diary and i am like yeah. She says that gay and i am like noway you dont know how cool that is, dont tell me you dont write in your personal diary. She said yes i did when i was like 7 and i am like whatever. She doesnt write down her msn and i ask her again, this time i just put the diary in front of her and hand her the pen and she starts copying what i wrote and i am like you know what let me do your handwriting analysis, i tell a few basic stuff here and there but not much since i was thinking of getting her e mail all this time and then i tell her again to write it down but she still doenst and the topic changes but i assert this time and i ask her to write it down and tell her that i will do a handwriting analysis so that if i make out that shes a flussy i wont talk to her and she does write it down this time. Fuck i forgot i should have gotten her number too but it was too late now and asking her number now would have been a bad idea.

Now my number comes up and i have to go talk to my councillor and she kept staring at me and i am like what and she makes that expression of nothing. So i am done with my coucillor while she is waiting for her turn and i am about to leave but i see her with one of her friends and they are talking and I stop by her and she says something but i didnt understand it fully so she says wait and continues her convo with that guy and i am staning there. That guy leaves and i am like what were you saying and she makes some random story. She is still standing away from me so we talk for like half a minute and i say ok i gotta go now. I bring my hands in front again to shake hands and she like just touches and thats it and i am like what is it are you a kid and then she shakes hand properly and i grab her hand and press it a little and let it go and i am off.

2.) Saw a chic on the elevator as i am going down one floor and she's going up on the other side, she looks at me and i look at her, she smiles and i smile back and say hi

The second one was just an achivement cause i dont usually pass smiles back or say hi to people in places like malls.

So what do you guys think of the whole FR, i think i might have come off a little needy and desperate and my body language wasnt that congruent either but i bantered brilliantly but some times a little way too much and way off the track. I just hate the fact that i had to ask her 4 time to write down her e mail and also the fact that i had to startg the conversation so many times and also that i spoke a little too much and should have let her speak a little more so i could find a little more about her and that would have given me an opportunity to bust on her relentlessly.

Anyways i really wanna see this chic again preferably in my bedroom...lol...but i really wanna ask her out for coffee or something but i fear that i killed all the attraction i created at first and that she might not be that interested now.

1.) When do i add her on my friends list on msn?
2.) How do I correct my mistakes and show higher value and get the attraction back on track?
3.) How should i go about her generally?
4.) Is it a good idea to ask her out this weekend?

Cheers
Mav

[superman]

You made a huge mistake...ALWAYS Reward Good Behavior...never punish it. You should forget the C&F and focus more on escalating on windows of opportunity.

[maverick]

What exactly do you mean superman? What was the good beahviour in the whole thing, how should i reward it and how did i punish her.....any elaboration on that

Cheers
Mav

[flow]

2.) Saw a chic on the elevator as i am going down one floor and she's going up on the other side, she looks at me and i look at her, she smiles and i smile back and say hi

The second one was just an achivement cause i dont usually pass smiles back or say hi to people in places like malls.

This was good Do more like that.

And I agree with Superman, you must cut down on C&F bantering. You kill attraction by doing to much bantering, Like 90% to much. One or two lines of bantering is enough, before you start building rapport. If you do to much bantering it becomes much harder to build rapport. And to much C&F also works as a punishment.

Stop bantering by changing tone and say something like: "Your cute, you remind me of a girl I had a crush on when I was 7" Then tell a short story from your own life when you where a kid and had a crush on a girl.
That would show that you dare to be vulnerable and personal. It also works as a reward. If she bantered back at you she gets a reward for that, if she didn't she gets a reward for complying with you teasing her. Then wait to see if she tells you something about herself. You started building rapport and you also rewarded her good behaviour so she most likely will do that.

[Halffull]

As soon as she tries to escalate with you and you bust on her for it instead of taking it seriously... it kills the vibe.

I make the same mistake all too often, still working on it.

That's why I never ever do the ... "what's your name? Guess." thing. It just completely murders the interaction.


A good way to start moving away from the busting into other things is to clearly change the type of kino you are doing. Put your arm around her and project that she should put her head on your shoulder. Then you can start with the more intense conversation.

[maverick]

Are you serious about the putting arm around her thingy, don't you think that would have been too early considering the situation, i mean since i made the mistake of just bantering and staying in the attraction stage and not moving on to comfort building and trust, i think this would ahve backfired and would have further led to more awkward situation since she let me touch her hair but that was just the beginning of my bantering with her but as soon as i bantered a lot, she didnt even shake hands until the end where she just touched my hand when i was going for a handshake but then i said what are you a kid and then we went in for a proper handshake

Any other suggestion guys

P.s. one thing i have learnt is that i am good at bantering but i have to keep it to a minimum and use it very rarely but use it when it strikes the most rather than just bantering all the time and thanks to all you guys, i will make sure i reward good behaviour from chics next time

Anyone out there got some idea for comfort building and trust routine since i think i should go for that now since i feel she still has some leftover attraction for me, i totally believe that or why would she add me into her msn, actually i did but still she has to approve so in other words she did.

On a sidenote i dont think i would be seeing her soon though unless i ask her or we make a plan to meet maybe somewhere in uni sometime but if that doesnt work i would be chatting up with her on msn so if anyone got some cool new ideas or routine which i can do with her online preferably sme comfort building and trust routine or anything that seems applicable to rectify and further enhance the tension so through which i can actually meet her sometime in uni soon

Cheers
Mav

[Halffull]

The idea is to use this is a learning experience and NEXT TIME, use the physical escalation to transition into more comfort type topics.

In this case, The easiest thing would have just been to give a hug, then maybe a quick kiss, at the end of the interaction.

The thing here is... you were waiting for her to escalate kino. You need to escalate kino. If you haven't been doing it, and have been having a long interaction... sometimes you need to just take the plunge and do it, or you lose a TON of ground as far as fuckability in her eyes. Giving the hug at the end would have shown her you're comfortable physically. Then coming out of the hug and going straight to a kiss would show her you are comfortable sexually.

The kiss might make things awkward tho. I dunno