FR: first time use of the DEL.

[elmariachi]

so i met this grl off of myspace a few days ago took her out to the park, did the whole kino thing incidental and hugged her when she gave me a present, set up a day 2 to go to the movies, she told me shes never kissed before so i was her first kiss. we made out through most of saw, then i told her i was bored and we should go somewhere else, so i drove her to some hill overlooking my city and we made out again and i felt her tits. got super turned on and told her to give me a blow job. she didnt want to i didnt make a big deal made out some more. after another 10 minutes of kissing took her home.

heres a convo that just happend.

Thanks for everything, bye. :-)

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: sergio
Date: Nov 6, 2007 5:56 PM


i understand, i actually thought about u all day 2day but were definitly on different pages, it was good meeting you im sure your gonna make some guy out there really really happy. :-)

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: anonny..mouse biatches :-)
Date: Nov 6, 2007 5:38 PM


Well I really appreciate your honesty, and I like how you respect the feelings of others, but I'm more into finding myself a guy who I can see myself with now and even still 10 years from now. I thought that I might have, but I now know how you view things in that area. I'm sorry Sergio but I'm looking for something serious, and I see now that i'm just not going to find that with you. It's a shame too because I really liked you.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: sergio
Date: Nov 6, 2007 5:23 PM


i enjoyed spending time with you too, didnt mean to make you feel uncomfortable its cuz i felt really comfortable being with you, and i always express whats on my mind weathr its hunger or wanting a bj haha. as far as dating im not into dating just 1 person exclusivly, i love women everiything about them thats how i am, im honest. as far as sex i love sex but im not gonna force you to do anything dont want to do, sex for me is shared pleasure.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: anonny..mouse biatches :-)
Date: Nov 6, 2007 2:39 PM


Hey Sergio,
Thanks for last night, I had a great time and I really enjoyed being with you. I think your really nice and sweet and I love the way you treat me. I'm really starting to like you a lot, but there's something I've been wanting to tell you since last night. Everything was great, I'm glad my first kiss was with you, but I've really never been with anyone before and I don't want to move too quickly into things. To tell you the truth you did make me feel uncomfortable when you brought up the subject of me giving a "BJ." I like you a lot, I do, so all I ask is if we can move slower into things. I'm okay with the kissing and hugging and holding hands, but I don't feel I'm ready for anything more "intimate" than that. When I'm ready believe me I'll let you know, haha, I'm just not ready for that kind of stuff right now. So are you okay with taking things slower, and do you really see me as a person you see yourself dating, because I see you as one, I just want to know if we're on the same page here? Well talk to you later, bye.

[bossyboots]

Hey elmariachi,

Sounds like you made a good decision to move on from this one... unless you wanted to be with this woman for the next 10 years

A couple of things about your post: It's great that you hugged her for giving you a present - setting up kino as a reward for compliance is very effective for getting more compliance and for shaping her perception that affection is something you give to her, not something you take from her.

That being said, you do the opposite when you ask her for a blowjob - you say in your post that you "told" her to give you one - I assume you mean you asked for it very directly and assumptively.

There's a few problems with this. 1. You force her to make a decision on the spot and verbalize it. Her first response will likely be "no" because she wants to stay in control. Once she's said no she'll want to be consistent with that 2. Although lots of women looove giving blowjobs, its really about your pleasure over hers - especially with a virgin. The great thing about the DEL is it just turns her on more and more and more and makes the entire experience about HER pleasure. Because the transitions are so smooth there's a lot less to object to.

By the way, in my early twenties, I "dated" a virgin and had some amazing sexual experiences. She was a christian and had some guilt issues around sex. I learned more about sex and how to escalate with her than I'd learned from anyone because I really had to turn her on and make her want it before she'd go to the next level...

[elmariachi]

Originally Posted by bossyboots

Hey elmariachi,

Sounds like you made a good decision to move on from this one... unless you wanted to be with this woman for the next 10 years

A couple of things about your post: It's great that you hugged her for giving you a present - setting up kino as a reward for compliance is very effective for getting more compliance and for shaping her perception that affection is something you give to her, not something you take from her.

That being said, you do the opposite when you ask her for a blowjob - you say in your post that you "told" her to give you one - I assume you mean you asked for it very directly and assumptively.

There's a few problems with this. 1. You force her to make a decision on the spot and verbalize it. Her first response will likely be "no" because she wants to stay in control. Once she's said no she'll want to be consistent with that 2. Although lots of women looove giving blowjobs, its really about your pleasure over hers - especially with a virgin. The great thing about the DEL is it just turns her on more and more and more and makes the entire experience about HER pleasure. Because the transitions are so smooth there's a lot less to object to.

By the way, in my early twenties, I "dated" a virgin and had some amazing sexual experiences. She was a christian and had some guilt issues around sex. I learned more about sex and how to escalate with her than I'd learned from anyone because I really had to turn her on and make her want it before she'd go to the next level...

hey thanks for the advice boots. im back in the game :-) i did move too fast with the whole bj thing, didnt really stay true to the del. this time ill try to turn her on like you said and like how it says in the ebook. i knew she would message me again....




Okay Sergio, consider me one of your dates then, haha. And no more Saw movies, I haven't been able to eat carne molida since then, haha. Talk to you later, let me know when you want to go out again, bye.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: sergio
Date: Nov 7, 2007 7:01 PM


haha i told you i wont make you do anything you dont want to do, just keep in mind when im with you its only u and me. i want you to think about it though, think about whats good for you.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: HI :-) anonymouse
Date: Nov 7, 2007 6:30 PM


Okay Sergio, but are you sure that's what you want. Keep in mind that I'm okay with the holding hands, hugging, and kissing, but any further than that I'm not to sure about. Especially knowing that I'm not the only 1, haha. Is it okay if I ask you why you want to see me again and are willing to date me and be with other people at the same time?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: sergio
Date: Nov 7, 2007 6:11 PM


ill keep you in mind :-) i loved the time we spent together. but i dont plan on anything long term anytime soon, i try to be honest as possible. im open to dating you but you have to realize u wont be the only 1 and ur open to find other guys too. but if you think u dont want something like that then im ok with that... but id really love to see you again.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: HI :-) anonymouse
Date: Nov 7, 2007 9:05 AM


One more thing:
If you ever decide to change your mind and you start thinking about finding someone to be with long term try and remember me cuz you'll always have a place in my heart; you know what's funny I thought about you all day yesterday too. Well I hope you find what your looking for Sergio, take care, bye. :-)



btw i have another date on saturday with another myspace girl, nother chance to use the del.

[El Cuchillo]

did you ever see her again?

[dman]

A minor piece of advice, I once read that how a person writes "I" is a reflection of themselves. If they can not be bothered to press the shift key for half a second to give themselves the capital "I" that they deserve and instead write "i".... what does that say about the respect they are showing to themselves? Can indicate they have a low self worth.

It really stood out to me that you never used capitalisation correctly when referring to yourself. She however did... it is quite a contrast when comparing your two writing styles.

I'd say based on skimming over what she wrote she is indeed still into you, yet you seem to be showing signs of supplication towards her you writings to her.

[El Cuchillo]

Originally Posted by dman

A minor piece of advice, I once read that how a person writes "I" is a reflection of themselves. If they can not be bothered to press the shift key for half a second to give themselves the capital "I" that they deserve and instead write "i".... what does that say about the respect they are showing to themselves? Can indicate they have a low self worth.

It really stood out to me that you never used capitalisation correctly when referring to yourself. She however did... it is quite a contrast when comparing your two writing styles.

I'd say based on skimming over what she wrote she is indeed still into you, yet you seem to be showing signs of supplication towards her you writings to her.

I see your point and actually agree...kind of. Actually Julian Foxx argues that using correct capitalization and punctuation might show too much compliance to her. So communicate using abbreviations and little to no punctuation so as to appear busy and not "too invested" in the message or impressing her.

I don't know...just a counterpoint to consider

[dman]

Oh yes, I've heard that view too. I'm a perfectionist and have a high level of education, which means I tend to do every little bit correctly.... regardless of who I'm talking too. Though now I try to be slightly more slack with girls and in general, but "I" is not something I'd compromise. I'd rather add in other little errors instead.

[rockstar]

Yeah the capitalizing your "I" was written in a David Shade newsletter but I think he referenced, maybe, Tony Robbins. In any case, I also read about how you should abbreviate and not punctuate etc.. so I capitalize my I's (but this is the only place where I put any effort--the idea is I am only willing to invest in myself).

I rite like dis wit mising leters +hope for mispellings as long as ppl can figur them out

[elmariachi]

haha you guys are funny, i did see her again she gave me 3 blow jobs this week, and i really dont want to see her again...

[rockstar]

why dont ya wanna see her again buyer's remorse? Or you dont find her attractive anymore

[elmariachi]

Originally Posted by rockstar

why dont ya wanna see her again buyer's remorse? Or you dont find her attractive anymore

she bugs to much. and i want more, my goal is 5 independent girls with smoking hot bodies, who are into kinky vouyeristic sex.

i had 2 this one and another 1 but im getting tired of this one and i got mad at the other 1 like a few weeks ago, she text me but i dont feel like talking to her anymore either haha

ive been wanting to get back out there in the field, havent went out with the intent to pickup in a looooong time :-) so far im not that good at opening and attracting (and closing for that matter) i have pretty good online game going on number closed last night in fact and gonna call her 2marrow,

but thats why ive been wanting to take a bootcamp to get past this opening and attracting thing.

[authenticallyme]

why cant an *i* just be an i, and an *I* be an I? is there a rule or format toe very way of thinking around these parts? im impatient when i type, so i use i. i think its a waste of time to capitalize everything on forums..........im busy. in reading too much into things, you all make it so complicated. and in not reading anything into what you should, you reveal how simple you really are.

sad, that a few BJ"s off a girl who you couldnt see enough into her soul, to give her the respect she herself filandered with; thats what a strong healthy person would do, resist, and be the bigger person. not rush in, to seek and destroy. you have no substance, darlin.

i mean does it strike anyone here that reading all this, form a woamns perspective, shows your inner lack of beauty, and reveals your inner ugliness, and there is not one post here that would attract me to any of you? even if your little tricks worked to get even authentic ME into bed, the truth remains, that in seeing into your posts, the reality still stands...im not attracted to you. you are not attractive. you do not stimulate. you have no depth. trick me out at the bar, with your oh-so-wondrous ways; hey im sure even somewhat together women fall for it every once in awhile (but not often-you get your cases off the nut market.....healthy women would see through this crap)....but i still dont like YOU. YOU, the person you are when you are all alone in your bed at night, thinking to yourself and feeling that void. i dont like that person. does that even matter to anyone? im not even mad......persoanlly at anyone. my discernment has been overworked here, and now my compassion is surfacing. you seek confidence, but the very way you go about it....shows your emptiness. and people generally arent attracted, in TRUTH, to people who are so empty that these ideas actually sound GOOD.

[flow]

Originally Posted by authenticallyme

why cant an *i* just be an i, and an *I* be an I? is there a rule or format toe very way of thinking around these parts? im impatient when i type, so i use i. i think its a waste of time to capitalize everything on forums..........im busy. in reading too much into things, you all make it so complicated. and in not reading anything into what you should, you reveal how simple you really are.

sad, that a few BJ"s off a girl who you couldnt see enough into her soul, to give her the respect she herself filandered with; thats what a strong healthy person would do, resist, and be the bigger person. not rush in, to seek and destroy. you have no substance, darlin.

i mean does it strike anyone here that reading all this, form a woamns perspective, shows your inner lack of beauty, and reveals your inner ugliness, and there is not one post here that would attract me to any of you? even if your little tricks worked to get even authentic ME into bed, the truth remains, that in seeing into your posts, the reality still stands...im not attracted to you. you are not attractive. you do not stimulate. you have no depth. trick me out at the bar, with your oh-so-wondrous ways; hey im sure even somewhat together women fall for it every once in awhile (but not often-you get your cases off the nut market.....healthy women would see through this crap)....but i still dont like YOU. YOU, the person you are when you are all alone in your bed at night, thinking to yourself and feeling that void. i dont like that person. does that even matter to anyone? im not even mad......persoanlly at anyone. my discernment has been overworked here, and now my compassion is surfacing. you seek confidence, but the very way you go about it....shows your emptiness. and people generally arent attracted, in TRUTH, to people who are so empty that these ideas actually sound GOOD.

Hey authenticallyme, instead of coming into this forum and do your best to insult every member, perhaps you could tell us what is your problem and maybe we can help you?

I mean its obvious from your post that you hate men, but also that you probably hate or despise yourself even more. But you don't tell us why this is, so we can't help you. Instead you just write a lot of insulting crap that has everything to do with your mental health and noting to do with the topics discussed or the persons involved.

So, what is your story?

/Flow

[elmariachi]

Originally Posted by authenticallyme

why cant an *i* just be an i, and an *I* be an I? is there a rule or format toe very way of thinking around these parts? im impatient when i type, so i use i. i think its a waste of time to capitalize everything on forums..........im busy. in reading too much into things, you all make it so complicated. and in not reading anything into what you should, you reveal how simple you really are.

sad, that a few BJ"s off a girl who you couldnt see enough into her soul, to give her the respect she herself filandered with; thats what a strong healthy person would do, resist, and be the bigger person. not rush in, to seek and destroy. you have no substance, darlin.

i mean does it strike anyone here that reading all this, form a woamns perspective, shows your inner lack of beauty, and reveals your inner ugliness, and there is not one post here that would attract me to any of you? even if your little tricks worked to get even authentic ME into bed, the truth remains, that in seeing into your posts, the reality still stands...im not attracted to you. you are not attractive. you do not stimulate. you have no depth. trick me out at the bar, with your oh-so-wondrous ways; hey im sure even somewhat together women fall for it every once in awhile (but not often-you get your cases off the nut market.....healthy women would see through this crap)....but i still dont like YOU. YOU, the person you are when you are all alone in your bed at night, thinking to yourself and feeling that void. i dont like that person. does that even matter to anyone? im not even mad......persoanlly at anyone. my discernment has been overworked here, and now my compassion is surfacing. you seek confidence, but the very way you go about it....shows your emptiness. and people generally arent attracted, in TRUTH, to people who are so empty that these ideas actually sound GOOD.

i agree with you on the whole "I" thing. ur reasons are different from mine though, i just dont capitalize cuz im lazy. :-)

theres alot of truth in your post, thats why we work on whats called inner game. read up on that and then cum back and we can argue some more. :-)

and its fine if your not attracted to me, there are millions and millions of women out there.

[authenticallyme]

you guys dont get it.

im saying, that even if you could trick me with your ways, to bed me......what does it matter, when seeing you as i see you here, i dont like what i see? if you dont care, that seems shallow, yet flow keeps insisting that isnt the case.

flow.......why do you think i hate men? im not trying to insult YOU or ANYONE, but i am insulting the tactics, mindsets, and principles here. big difference.

im not going to tell you what my problem is. i know the game, and i wont be baited. sure, i have problems, but like the poster below you....you could quickly see the parallels im trying to make, instead of saying they have nothing to do with anything. THAT is just as insulting. nothing to do with the people who posted or the topics involved? denail, is say. you choose not to put two and two together, to avoid the ensuing conversation. which, is ok.

why yous ay my mental health is affected,simply becasue i challenge anyone, is absurd. again, is there but one parralel in your mind? woman comes here + says her mind = mental health issues? is that always the case? never any 'grey areas', always the black and white? i said what i did to hopefully challenge someone, into examining themselves, and asking themselves why they think the way they do. if it doesnt permeate anyone, so be it, but i still challenge. whether someone changes the way they think due to it, is not my goal. my goal is to confront, whether some good scoems out of it or not. either way, i did what i knew was right to do for me. im not here to control anyone, but to get them to think, and consider.

i dont need help, and i dont offer a story. that wasnt my purpose in posting here.

your questions to me, and comments, only reitterate what i posted. and so the wheel spins.......