LR: Almost too simple

[ballin]

From what I've read by the instructors and from those posting LRs, I've learned that those who are having success seem to do so without having to work some sort of "incredible, skillful game" that was full of expert moves and what not in order to get a lay. For those who have success it seems just too easy. I have recently had a taste of this and will share with you. I hope this helps some people and am happy to be able to give back to this forum. Of course now that I'm sleeping with this girl I'm back into "unfamiliar territory" since it's unfortunately been so long, so any advice as to where to go from here is much appreciated. Anyways, I'll get to the story.

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My landlord works out a deal with our University so that our apartments are always filled with foreign exchange students. While most of the newcomers this year were dudes, a sexy blond German girl did happen to move in a couple of months ago. We'll call her Germany.

One day my roommate and I are talking in the living room and we hear knocking. I answer the door, and to my surprise a hot blond girl (Germany) with a foreign accent is asking me for a corkscrew to open a bottle of wine. We have a brief introduction/chat about where she's from and she returns the corkscrew to me. She leaves and my roommate and I both exchange smiles.


I'll outline my interactions with Germany over the course of the next few weeks. Although nothing spectacular happened game-wise I'll put this in for informational purposes.

* I bump into her again while she's outside looking for her roommate who is hanging out with some neighbor dude's. We chat briefly about nothing important. I don't even think I mentioned anything that would be considered a "DHV". The neighbor dudes come out and we all talk. They go chase their dog into her apartment with her roommate but she stays talking to me for a minute. I then exit to go cook some Ramen and she returns to her apartment in which the neighbors are hanging out. (Dammit they're getting the jump on me I think to myself - whatever, I've got other girls who are more promising prospects - so I thought anyways).
***I later found out from her this neighbor guy was trying to game her. He wound up with his arm around her on the couch one night and asked her if he could kiss her. She hates it when guys ask if they can kiss her instead of just knowing so she said no (I think we could all see that one coming). He later fucks her less-attractive roommate and never talks to her again. This gives Germany the impression (along with several experiences with other guys) that all American guys are just looking for sex and are pushy about it. She also developed a fear that even I wouldn't want to talk with her after sex (as discussed in Vin's 5 objections article).

* My roommate's birthday: We all pregame with a bunch of his friends at our apartment. I go over to Germany's apartment and invite her and her roommate over to join us. They were going to go to the bar but have wishy-washy plans so they join us. Long story short, we all go to another party. My roommate is blacked out so I spend most of the time carrying him around. I interact with Germany very little. The most interaction was when 4 of us briefly danced in a circle together at the party. The whole time I am being a good friend and tending to my roommate while my friends are putting much effort into talking to Germany. Again, my interactions with her were pretty minimal.

* She stops by the next day for no reason and chats with my roommate and I for 5 minutes... she just wanted to see how he was doing since he was such a mess the night before.

* Wednesday nights I work with a bar in town to put together a "hip hop" themed night. Instead of usual top 40 cd-spinning DJs we have real DJs and my friend's and I go there to have breakdance sessions. My friend who talked to Germany during the night of the party bumped into her on campus and got her to come out to it. I was surprised to see her and gave them compliments on being cool and coming out. I think I also qualified her on a little dance move she did. Otherwise there was not much gaming of her that night either. Perhaps some social proof since I know the manager and talked to other girls at the bar who were interested in me.

So up to this point I have a few other female prospects that I thought were going to turn out as lays for sure (but never did), and although I realize the possibility is there, the thought of laying Germany does not seem like it was going to happen in my near future.

THE LAY

Friday night my roommate and I invent a new mixed drink and go out to the bar we always go to (same one as Wednesday nights). I hate to admit, I was drunker than I usually ever get, but still remember most of the critical details.

We approach the bar and there is a long line. No problem the manager's outside so I say whats up and he bounces us right in through the back. Gotta love the social proof even though most people don't even notice this.

I'm in the bar being my usual social self and talking to people. Didn't even make it up to the dance floor. I'm talking to this cute girl I know as an acquaintance who seems pretty into me. I apparently got her number as is evident by a text she sent me later. Mid conversation I bump into Germany at the bar. I don't remember exactly what we talked about, but I do remember sensing some jealousy from the other girl who began talking intently to my friend.

Last call. Lights come on. I leave at the same time as Germany. Apparently my DJ friend hits on her outside the bar a little and I encourage him to game some girls or something (I don't remember this though).

I'm walking home talking to Germany, again up to this point I really haven't done a single thing as far as consciously trying to run game. One thing that is key though, is that on the walk home I realize after some time that I am walking with Germany and that no one else is with us. I definitely remember taking note of this as a window of opportunity.

We get back to the apartments and walk up to by her door. We start to make out. I don't remember exactly how it went down unfortunately but I do know that I didn't ask her if I could kiss her I probably just did my default: looked sexually into her eyes and progressed from there.

One interesting note is that I don't believe I even had much kino up to this point. I really wasn't working the ladder much and definitely wasn't making any overt moves. hmmmm.

So we're making out against the wall for several minutes. I am grinding up between her legs, pushing her up against the wall outside her door. I then proceeded onward whereas in the past I may have just been content with the make-out. This is what I see as my main key to success here. I basically take note of increasingly sexual charge in the make-out and ask if I can get some water from her apartment. I later found out from her that she was trying very hard to keep herself from letting me in because she knew what would happen... although she put up no resistance when I asked for the water.

So I drink some water in her kitchen and then proceed to make-out again. I then pick her up and carry her into her bedroom and then toss her on her bed.

I continue to make-out with her and go into ramp mode with some alterations. She says something about dimples on our bellies and I say something like "look our bellies are kissing" and pull our shirts up get the belly-on-belly contact. I then progress to kiss her belly a bit. Since she was already turned on from all the grinding I remember just pulling her pants down, pulling her panties aside and eating her out a bit. I did this a little and then just pulled my pants off and sealed the deal.

Since then I have been hangin out with her and hooking up with her for the past week. I now have new concerns which I will continue in this next post. Advice is appreciated.

Thanks for reading

[ballin]

So I'll admit that I have had the issue of not-knowing specifically and definitely what I am shooting for with women. On one hand, I want to be able to continue to practice my skills even after getting lays, but on the other hand I want a woman who I am seeing regularly so that I can grow sexually and become a sexual master. As Daniel Rose often talks about, being an expert in the bedroom will give you the most confidence and also is the best way to keep girls coming back for more. I have decided that I want to keep hooking up with Germany so that I can develop my sexual skills and won't worry about other girls for now. After all, she is going back to Germany in July so I won't be out for too long.

All seems to be going ok so far. We have had sex probably more nights than not since this all started two Fridays ago. We haven't had any relationship status talks and I am not bringing this up myself as Vin recommends in Dating Diablo.

I see two main problems for me right now. For one, I haven't had a sexual relationship with a girl in a while so I am constantly battling my emotions of worrying about keeping her. I am trying really hard to not act needy, but find myself worrying too much sometimes.

Secondly, I am not as good in bed as I thought I would be. (I'll post a link to this in the sex forum since this is relevant there) With the last girl I had sex with some time ago, I had fucked her for a long time in several positions, etc. With Germany, I have had extremely shitty stamina. I know that this is not all that matters, but I am wondering why I am consistently so pre-mature. It's not like I've never had this problem before, but it's never been this consistent a problem.

I typically eat her out first and can feel her body tremble when I do. I'm pretty sure those orgasms are real. I sometimes stay hard after fucking her to keep going for a tiny bit... but I'm not sure if she's lying about those orgasms... I think maybe. All in all, I feel the sex is descent enough for now, but that I must improve (and want to anyways for my own benefit).

The second to last time I had sex with her was particularly disastrous. We were lying in bed. I took my clothes off since I didn't want to sleep with them on and she left hers on. We talked for some time and I began to worry that she was going to play the holding off game already. At one point I grabbed her and manhandled her to the other side of the bed. This seemed to turn her on enough to have sex. My main mistake this night: despite my knowledge of the ill-effects weed smoking has on game, I decided to have my last smoke (I quit) while getting my dick sucked since I always wanted to and also because it had increased my stamina greatly in the past. So it was going great. I was on top of her sticking my dick in her mouth and smoking this blunt. She doesn't smoke but even got so into it that she took a puff. Then (it was really good stuff) I became extremely high when she was fucking me from on top and I think I even busted a nut before I was in all the way. So much for the stamina help. I then got so high that I had one of these rare paranoid episodes that I don't normally have. Since she was grinding my cum all over us I led her to the shower. It was ok but I started acting kinda strange being so high. I then became so high and paranoid I couldn't even lay with her and let her go to sleep while I did other stuff. Everything seemed fine in the morning but I know that it must of been a huge turn-off and weird thing for her. I quit smoking like I planned and am glad for it (also because I'm on the job hunt and don't want to fail a UA).

We had sex again last night, and it seemed to go down pretty descent. I am slowly becoming more dominant in the bedroom and incorporating a little dirty talk.
The one problem was that she seemed to be holding off last night. She got in bed watching a movie with me with her clothes on and tried to pull the "I'm tired I'm just gonna fall asleep" thing. I wasn't tired and didn't want to have the first no-sex night after what happened the night before. So I began giving her a back rub and then proceeded to trade off massages with her on various parts of our bodies. I got it to where I was massaging her legs and inner-thighs and just started rubbing her pussy through her panties. It was all downhill from there.

ADVICE PART

So I have been wondering exactly how I should be handling this relationship. I don't know how often I should be hanging out with her (we hung out a lot last week). I don't want to smother her but at the same time I want to progress things sexually to where that relationship is stronger. I don't know how much she expects to sleep with me during the week. I have all the community sex literature and am refreshing on those. I kinda tried to communicate to her that I am all about exploring new things sexually and becoming more masterful but I can't tell if she gets it... or would just rather have a guy who is somehow naturally really good at sex. Like I said before, since it's been so long for me I probably am being overly worried and needy but I am trying to fight this.

Any advice is much appreciated as always.

Thanks for reading (Jeez my posts are always so freakin long).

[diablo]

ADVICE PART

So I have been wondering exactly how I should be handling this relationship. I don't know how often I should be hanging out with her (we hung out a lot last week). I don't want to smother her but at the same time I want to progress things sexually to where that relationship is stronger. I don't know how much she expects to sleep with me during the week. I have all the community sex literature and am refreshing on those. I kinda tried to communicate to her that I am all about exploring new things sexually and becoming more masterful but I can't tell if she gets it... or would just rather have a guy who is somehow naturally really good at sex. Like I said before, since it's been so long for me I probably am being overly worried and needy but I am trying to fight this.

when you say "exploring new things sexually and becoming more masterful"
...what does that mean?
what kind of new things sexually?

"more masterful..."
lol... did you really say that to her?


funny shit about you gettin high on top of her
then smearin cum everywhere, haha...

[spy]

First, women from other countries are usually easier becase they are (1) more natural than American women due to different upbringing and (2) have their defenses down since they are "traveling". So, just to boost my game, I'd go for foreing women any time...

Anyways, as far as your stamina situation, I can relate. A few times, when I was nervous thinking of something else (problems in family) and not able to be in the moment, I had both premature finish and limp dick. I can't tell you how to fix the "be in the moment" thing. You are already worrying about a lot of stuff, like what to do with this "relationship", etc., so that certainly doesn't help.

A quick fix -- take some Yohimbe (2% is enough, don't use stronger shit unless you need it and it doesn't give you chills) and fuck her brains out. That will bring you back into the saddle... ;-)

[ballin]

Originally Posted by diablo

when you say "exploring new things sexually and becoming more masterful"
...what does that mean?
what kind of new things sexually?

"more masterful..."
lol... did you really say that to her?


funny shit about you gettin high on top of her
then smearin cum everywhere, haha...

haha no I didn't say that word for word. I forgot what I said exactly but I was trying to give her the impression that I'm trying to grow in my sexuality and I'd like to do this with her and experience different ways to give her orgasms. I was also trying to make it clear to her that her having an orgasm shouldn't be our goal but rather just us enjoying giving each other pleasure and enjoying the experience as a whole. I think I read from David Shade that its bad to make a woman's orgasm a goal and will inhibit it more within her. I just wanna find the ways to please her the most to the point where she's the one trying to get sex from me and not where I have deal with her making it difficult to have sex all the time. I'm not sure if this is the path I'm headed towards yet, but sometimes I get the feeling it could be. On the other hand we get along really well and since I wrote this post she hit me up on facebook offering me German pancakes tomorrow morning. I don't think I'll try to bang her tonight. I'm too freakin exhausted plus I think she needs a little space now and again.

First, women from other countries are usually easier becase they are (1) more natural than American women due to different upbringing and (2) have their defenses down since they are "traveling". So, just to boost my game, I'd go for foreing women any time...

Anyways, as far as your stamina situation, I can relate. A few times, when I was nervous thinking of something else (problems in family) and not able to be in the moment, I had both premature finish and limp dick. I can't tell you how to fix the "be in the moment" thing. You are already worrying about a lot of stuff, like what to do with this "relationship", etc., so that certainly doesn't help.

A quick fix -- take some Yohimbe (2% is enough, don't use stronger shit unless you need it and it doesn't give you chills) and fuck her brains out. That will bring you back into the saddle... ;-)

Yeah Europeans are definitely more open sexually. She seems like a sexually healthy girl and is also super-chill. This is why I am cool with dating her for a bit. Of course I'd like to think that she isn't soo easy. On one hand she has told me about several guys who have tried to get down with her since she's been here and so far I'm the only one even able to get to make-out let alone home base. There was no LMR but she told me later that she really wanted to resist letting me into her apartment because she didn't trust American guys so far.

I might have to check out that yohimbe stuff.

[diablo]

haha no I didn't say that word for word. I forgot what I said exactly but I was trying to give her the impression that I'm trying to grow in my sexuality and I'd like to do this with her and experience different ways to give her orgasms. I was also trying to make it clear to her that her having an orgasm shouldn't be our goal but rather just us enjoying giving each other pleasure and enjoying the experience as a whole. I think I read from David Shade that its bad to make a woman's orgasm a goal and will inhibit it more within her. I just wanna find the ways to please her the most to the point where she's the one trying to get sex from me and not where I have deal with her making it difficult to have sex all the time. I'm not sure if this is the path I'm headed towards yet, but sometimes I get the feeling it could be. On the other hand we get along really well and since I wrote this post she hit me up on facebook offering me German pancakes tomorrow morning. I don't think I'll try to bang her tonight. I'm too freakin exhausted plus I think she needs a little space now and again.

i agree with the notion of "not making her orgasm the main goal"
try that stuff spy recommended for the quick fix...
for a long fix of your premature-ness...
try kagel exercises.
also, try to never masturbate quickly.
always masturbate for 15 minutes then cum.

now... dig DEEEEP inside yourself...
what do you REALLY wanna do in bed with her?
comeon... let it out dude... this is just an internet forum.
you wanna fuck her in the ass?
you wanna tie her up?
what do you wanna do?
GET SPECIFIC... if not with us on the forum... get specific with yourself.
then let yourself come up with all the answers
and man....
don't be afraid of your sexual desires....
WHATEVER YOU WANT... you will get it.
DIGGGGG. hahaha

[ballin]

Originally Posted by diablo

i agree with the notion of "not making her orgasm the main goal"
try that stuff spy recommended for the quick fix...
for a long fix of your premature-ness...
try kagel exercises.
also, try to never masturbate quickly.
always masturbate for 15 minutes then cum.

now... dig DEEEEP inside yourself...
what do you REALLY wanna do in bed with her?
comeon... let it out dude... this is just an internet forum.
you wanna fuck her in the ass?
you wanna tie her up?
what do you wanna do?
GET SPECIFIC... if not with us on the forum... get specific with yourself.
then let yourself come up with all the answers
and man....
don't be afraid of your sexual desires....
WHATEVER YOU WANT... you will get it.
DIGGGGG. hahaha

I got some of that yohimbe stuff but didn't try it last night because I was worried I would get no sleep. I found some interesting info on all this stuff on the Yohimbe, tongkat ali, horny goat weed (Epimedium) website. This guy seems very well versed in all of these substances and claims that any of the stuff you buy in regular US stores is devoid of the active substances. He also says that yohimbe is a little dangerous and he strongly prefers tongkat ali. The real stuff can be bought at tongkatali.org and is kind of expensive. I'll have to try it sometime.

So I definitely feel I'm starting to get "back in the saddle" as Spy said after last night. We went back to my place and I told her I had a surprise for her. I made sure she didn't open her eyes, took off her clothes, put her on her back and massaged her with that oil that heats up when you breath on it and tastes good. I think that increasingly sensual message along with kissing is a good foreplay to work her up and get her turned on.... I know it's nothing to crazy yet but I wanted to have some lube so I made my new purchase into somewhat of an experience.

I also took my time while fucking her. I did some taoist thrusting stuff. Alternating between short thrusts, slow and deep and then some fast and hard fucking. I would pull out if I got to close and rub and smack her with my dick and finger her. She seemed to enjoy it the whole time. I'm getting better with my dirty talk and more expressive and such with the build-up to coming. She really enjoyed this. I definitely was able to fuck much longer and drew the whole thing out for a while. Also, she was on her period, but put in some different tampon that wasn't even noticeable. There was not blood anywhere thank god. I pretended like I didn't give a shit but in all honesty I would have been a little grossed out if there was blood on my dick, but there wasn't. She said she was very happy that it didn't bother me.

All in all it was a great experience and after she was telling me how much she enjoys having sex with me and how happy she was that I kissed her on the night that I executed the first lay. So I feel a lot better overall now.

As far as digging to find what I really want... I'm glad you suggest this Diablo because I can see the importance. I feel I really do have to dig though....

I want to be able to make her cum through many ways (fingering, intercourse, etc. Sure even anal which I haven't ever done. Do you clean her ass before? Isn't it dirty and sketch to put your dick in there? Pretty much if I can have the kind of control over her orgasms like in the David Shade Manual and be able to do all the stuff talked about in there I think I would be pretty content. Tying her up would be cool to and I think I'll have to do that one too... I don't know what to tie the ropes to though because there are no posts or anything on my bed....

I also think it would be fun to take her to this garden that my University has out in these fields at night. There is this covered area with benches and a little waterfall thing. It would be cool to fuck her outside there if she had like a skirt on or something....

...here's the thing though with all this stuff...well particularly the outside fucking thing. I have to ask myself if I really want to do it because it is what really turns me on sexually, or if I just want to because I feel like it would be a cool story and experience to have under my belt. Is it something that's just so I can say "yeah I've done that" or something that really turns me on and satisfies me sexually... maybe I have to just try some of these things and see if I like them. Maybe I just have to have sex a few dozen more times until it becomes more mundane and I feel like I need some new more exciting experiences... I dunno.. I guess it's all part of the journey.

[diablo]

As far as digging to find what I really want... I'm glad you suggest this Diablo because I can see the importance. I feel I really do have to dig though....

I want to be able to make her cum through many ways (fingering, intercourse, etc. Sure even anal which I haven't ever done. Do you clean her ass before? Isn't it dirty and sketch to put your dick in there? Pretty much if I can have the kind of control over her orgasms like in the David Shade Manual and be able to do all the stuff talked about in there I think I would be pretty content. Tying her up would be cool to and I think I'll have to do that one too... I don't know what to tie the ropes to though because there are no posts or anything on my bed....

i can tell you really care about this chick by the things you say
and THAT is why this is going to workout exactly how you want it to!

analsex.
clean her ass before, yes..
suggest she take a shower with you.
also... i suggest you buy an assplug.
just ramming your dick in there will hurt the poor girl.
unless you have a little dick... you should go get a butplug (a small one).
and you don't just ram you dick in there, put a condom on first!
just two nights ago i was fucking my girl from behind
and fucking her asshole even harder with a buttplug
causing her to say,(and i quote) "i've never came like that before... omg, i came so hard baby"
so... definately worth learning... pm me if you wanna learn more about anal training your girl.

you don't need posts to tie a girl up..
i have silk scarves i use to blindfold my girlfriends
and tie their hands above their head, behind their back, etc.
and i don't have posts on my bed either

looks like you're in for a KINKY ride!