She's not attracted to me

[TouchUK]

Here is the problem:
Last weekend she split from her bf who was two timing her. As it turns out cause she's Italian - she knows no body but her bf and his so-called friends.

On Friday -returns my call andasks if we can meet.
She starts unloading her boyfriend problems unto me. I provide her shoulder to cry on but when I initate even the slightest kino, she rebukes me ops: and says that she's not attractive to me. After a while,I called it quits and home.

On Saturday -she calls me again - crying wanting to me!
Now the two timer is her ex. and she tells that she's free to date again. She wants to date a musician( because she's a violin teacher and doing her masters). : I just listen and initate kino as perscribed a la Juggler/Dicarlo . At each escalation, she rebukes me and says that she's not attractive to me. :| Initally, this would faze me but hey! - there are plenty of women.She keeps asking me if I am upset and just brush it off.

Then she starts telling how she has no friends and wants ME to introduce to my friends and broaden her circle. Initally, I thought no problem then a friend pointed out other women seeing us together would think we are a couple and ruiin my other openings.

So what should I do?
Truth be told - am seriously into her

Touchuk

[Mr. Incredible]

I think you should stop letting her cry on your shoulder. The signs are that she sees you as lower in status than she is. That's why she's asking you to do things for her. She cannot be attracted to you unless she sees you as higher in status.

At the very least, get her to do something for you in exchange for your help. For example: If she wants to meet your friends, hold a dinner party where she can meet them but MAKE HER DO THE COOKING FOR IT (all Italian women can cook can't they? ) After all, that's only fair right? If you are the host of the party, then you will be the "top dog" at the party and she will begin to see you as having high status.

[iambrian]

You're posting on vin dicarlo board and you have ABSOLUTELY zero complaince with her other than being her bitch.

Vin would've been ashame of you.

[JerZ]

Looks like she's just using you for her own benefit and that's probably why her previous relationship didn't last. I wouldn't put up with her shit and never supplicate to her needs unless she does something for you first, like Mr. Incredible said.

[TouchUK]

Yes, you are all right
This was a constant pattern which I did not realise until now.

However, now her routine's busted and I'm gonna have fun turning the tables. I sensed she's playing with me but I'm on to her.

So my thinking - so she wants to hang with me and meet my friends? How can I use this? Right now the level of attraction is not sufficient and I'm going to use our time together to "draw her into my reality" and as you all rightly tell me off for I will stop being her shoulder to cry on.

I have since being giving the issue of kino some thought. Since she wants to get to know my crowd and do things with me, why don't we do things where kino is a natural part of what we do So I have enrolled us on salsa classes - we get to know each other and she gets reconditioned to accepting my kino.
From there I simply escalate! What do you think?

Touch

[carpe_diem]

man, you are in the deep inner cortex of the friends zone.

never talk to this girl again!

so she is not attracted to you, but wants to tell you all her problems and you to make friends for her?

you are way too far gone to turn this around I think, find another girl, and get better at physical escalation and sexual tension, and avoid this friends zone stuff. The friends zone sucks man, she sees you as an asexual being, like a teddy bear.

Matt