Three Questions for Vin or anybody who thinks they have the answer

[BigGame]

1. Sometimes I have no idea what to talk about. How do you cultivate the ability to always have something good to say.....or do you have to have canned stories????

2. Is it possible for a short black guy to bang hot white girls on the regular who usually don't go for black guys???? (I've had sex with white girls who just like black guys but they don't count)


3. When talking to groups do you win them over by stories or do you NOT go for groups???

[Roulette]

Originally Posted by BigGame

1. Sometimes I have no idea what to talk about. How do you cultivate the ability to always have something good to say.....or do you have to have canned stories????

Since I feel like keyboard jockeying it up tonight, I will indulge your questions good sir.

In short, you dont always or ever have to have something good to say. Don't look at it as you having to impress her with your words (have you been reading Mystery Method?), but rather her having to impress you with her words.

Focus on asking broad, open ended questions. For example "so what do you do for fun?" if she doesn't answer the question in a way in which you desire, try opening up to her first. Lead by example. Say "well, I like to blah blah". Now she will feel much more compelled to open up to you. The more talking she does, the better. You want her trying to impress you. Never ever brag either. If anything, verbalise lower value by disqualifying yourself.

So much of our "value" is subcommunicated through body language, vocal tonality, our image/style and touch. This combines to create what is known as a "vibe".

Originally Posted by BigGame

2. Is it possible for a short black guy to bang hot white girls on the regular who usually don't go for black guys???? (I've had sex with white girls who just like black guys but they don't count)

It is very possible. ITotem will have much to say on this I'm sure. You may not have the specific value XYZ white chick is looking for, but you may have much universal value every women looks for in a man (confidence, charisma, ambition, etc...) Universal value always out weights specific value. Remember that. I want you to do something for me. Think about your percieved flaws (being black and short) and tell me how those "flaws" can be used to your advantage. I can think of a few ways already.

Originally Posted by BigGame

3. When talking to groups do you win them over by stories or do you NOT go for groups???

You need not win them over with anything. They need to win you over. Try losing the agenda first. Approach the group with the intent on giving them something: fun, a good conversation, etc. Focus on finding something special out about the women you are interacting with. Every women is special in some non-physical way. Focus on finding that, then let her know you find it attractive.

[funkyrhino]

2. Is it possible for a short black guy to bang hot white girls on the regular who usually don't go for black guys?

here's the deal on that. I'm not short but I'm older. Age, height etc is irrelevant. Style was what about 5'6 or something. Zan is like 42. I know guys who are a bit chunky and heavy set that pull women. And me? I'm older, black and broke as hell right now. LOL! The last babe I pulled was a 25 year old hot white woman at Starbucks and her man has money and bought her a SUV, paid her rent and took her traveling overseas. Here I am telling her that I my car is broke down and I work at a liquor store and 45 minutes later we're at my apartment almost butt naked. My point is that those things you mentioned are somewhat limiting beliefs about what is possible and if you hold on to them too tightly you end up being more hesitant. I still do at times.

Now there are several reasons why people resist stepping outside of their box
in my opinion. 1) they aren't attracted to it 2) they are somewhat attracted and curious but they are under the scrutiny of peer pressure, meaning they are concerned about what other people are going to think and say. Usually
number 2 is the case most of the times.
Are these women verbalizing this to you or is this you thinking for them?

[ITotem]

Wow, Roulette is volunteering my services now. Thanks, buddy Actually, he did a pretty good job at saying everything there is to say.

Originally Posted by BigGame

1. Sometimes I have no idea what to talk about. How do you cultivate the ability to always have something good to say.....or do you have to have canned stories????

My real question is: when are you not finding something to say? At the beginning of an interactino or in the middle?

If you can't find something to say at the beginning, start talking about yourself. I know your Mom probably told you it's bad to talk about yourself, but it's not. Really. Tell the person about your latest insight, your latest adventure, your daily routine... whatever. This allows the other person to know a bit more about you, feel more comfortable around you... and maybe find something they can relate to you.

Generally speaking, for pickup purposes, talk about things that you like. Talking about things that you like show value. If you talk about things that you have an interest on, you are less than likely to run out of things to say. Once the other person starts talking back to you, LISTEN. A lot of people run out of things to say because they are worried abouto what to say next. Instead, try to understand the other person better... and ask more about that topic... That's when Roulette mentioned: make them impress you. Get the other person talking about what they like and relate to that.

You can read more here: The Art of Conversation and Storytelling

Originally Posted by BigGame

2. Is it possible for a short black guy to bang hot white girls on the regular who usually don't go for black guys???? (I've had sex with white girls who just like black guys but they don't count)

Yes, it's possible. Roulette already talked about universal and specific value... but what you want to realize is that you want to make yourself attainable to that person. By the simple fact that you are telling her that you have white girl friends... that you do things that she'd do... she can bond/relate to you better.

As she gets comfortable with you, a white girl may not even think she wants to bang you. However, your job is to create intrigue... show her how you being YOU is good FOR her. If you listened to Vin's Dating Diablo, you want to create intrigue. Make yourself appealing enough that she wants to get to know you.

Originally Posted by BigGame

3. When talking to groups do you win them over by stories or do you NOT go for groups???

When talking to groups, it's good practice to be social with everyone. Your goal is not to win them over in any form or fashion. Your goal is to be cool with everyone (at least with the leaders of the group). From there, you'll have a lot less issues with social logistics when you start giving more attention to the girl you are interested in.

If you have really tight game, you can probably go straight for the girl but you'll have to win her HARD so that she will side with you when she gets peer-pressured to stick with them.